Tuesday, August 11, 2009

What to accept when you are expecting...

Ok time for some humor! I can not tell you how many different conversations I have had with fellow pregnant women, new mom friends, family members, people I don't know.... (you get the picture) ... about being pregnant. So I decided to put all those wonderful conversations in my next blog... a bit to vent, a bit to share what things people truly think are ok to say and a bit to make you chuckle!

Many of these are obviously things I have not experienced yet b/c well I still have 6 weeks until this child comes... but its entertaining reading!

1. The famous "wives tales"... just because you are sick or are gaining a ton of weight or your face changes... you are having a GIRL. If you crave salty foods or your ass gets huge... you are having a boy. Guess what, every person is different when they get pregnant... Each person has a different pregnancy... I know its fun to talk about the wives tales but I just can't wait till the baby comes and see what everyone says about their predictions!

2. Comments about your size / diet: I know that this is VERY general... but I am just amazed at what some people will say. Here are a few that people have mentioned or I have been lucky enough to get myself! Guess what, you get big when you have a baby!
* OMG are you having twins?
* When are you due? Really, that much longer?
* WOW, you look amazing, I really thought you'd be much bigger considering
* Are you sure you should be eating that?
* Maybe you are eating too much salt / sugar?

3. The breastfeeding controversy: No nip this one in the bud... yes I will be nursing... as long as the baby is up to the challenge. Yes it is legal to breast feed in public and no I will not be whipping my breast out to do so... Its funny b/c even on the news lately, there have been advocacy groups that gather and mass feed their kids in public to prove a point. Its a food source and its the best one for the baby. Now granted, neither Brian or I were breast fed and we came out fine... Its a choice we both made and think its best for the baby. People who judge or make comments about your decision are just arrogant... or maybe they are jealous b/c its not something that worked for them... either way, its another one of those personal decisions... But rest assured, you seeing my naked breast when I feed my child is not something I want and would be far more uncomfortable for me than for you!

4. The Name Game - My advice...Unless you really want to hear what people think, keep your mouth shut until the big day. It is much harder for people to say something about a name they don't like when its attached to a living baby.

5. The hospital papparazzi: (be mindful that this is a snapshot of what I have heard) Its so exciting when a baby is coming - well for some family's. But the bottom line is that a woman is pushing out something the size of a watermelon thru a hole the size of an apple! Its painful and uncomfortable... and then maybe you push and push and nothing happens... so they need to cut you open, shove tubes in places that are just not fun etc etc. Then everyone wants to barage into your room while you are all swollen and exposed and raw to see "the baby". Its a wonderful thing but the hospital is a place for sick or recovering people... its where someone goes to get better. While having a baby is the most exciting thing in this world... no one thinks about the mom that just went thru the ringer! Everyone waited for the baby to come... a few more hours so that mom is comfy and refreshed is not going to hurt anyone??? I truly feel bad for some of the woman who have told me their stories.
* I can tell you that Brian & I are playing it by ear. Granted, we know there are some people who are not going to listen and will show up anyway but once active labor begins, the cell phones are being turned off and the news will be shared once its all over... no text updates, no FB updates.... just good old fashioned waiting. Plus we have agreed that spending this uninterupted time with our first born is something we can never do over and try to do again... so we are going to take our time and be a family by ourselves for just a little bit.

6. What are your cravings?: What the hell are you NOT craving. One minute you want ice cream, the next you want chips... five minutes later you want fruit or water. Its great when someone tells you that your cravings are weird or abnormal.

7. How are you feeling?: These four words drive every pregnant woman insane! I know it seems simple enough but those words, although simple enough, seem very loaded when you are pregnant. The people that ask this question always do so with such concern (or so it seems). I feel at times (just like my fellow preggie's) that you actually have to bite your tongue so the hormones don't take control and make you say that you feel like shoving your foot up someone's behind... LOL... Although I have to say that when the question is coming from someone out of general concern - it feels good to feel like someone cares without an agenda.
* For those of you dying to ask me this question - to save you some time: I have to go to the Dr. every week now... its been above 95* with a heat index of over 100* for over a week... the AC is our house is set at 65* (yes Brian is freezing)... I fight with a guy at work over the thermastat control daily... my belly touches the steering wheel now... my feet get swollen in a matter of less than 5 minutes if its too warm... I can only sleep on an incline and on my right side... I eat all day long - all the meals run together b/c I can only eat small amounts at a time... My shoe size had grown one whole size so far... you can see the baby move around with the naked eye just by watching the belly... I have lost all bladder control... yes I will be attending my brother in laws wedding on Sept 5th... no we still do not know the sex of the baby.... updates from Dr. include: cervix is softening, baby is in position, blood pressure is perfectly fine at this point - all things normal for someone with a shortened cervix at 34 wks!... They do think this baby may come a few days early... No we have not picked one name yet (we are going into delivery with 3 of each and will wait for the baby to decide)... No we are not telling anyone those 6 names... Baby calms down when listening to piano music... Ok so that is the scoop! No need to keep asking... the only things that will change is that eventually the baby will come out - when its the right time :)

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